As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
