I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
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Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
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He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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