Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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