I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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