You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize
