I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
