Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
