I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I will be naked everywhere
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
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