maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Randomize
