so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
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My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
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Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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