Everything about him screamed your future.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
