Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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