This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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