Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
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