So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
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it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
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Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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