butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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