You made me cry and you don't even care
I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize