it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize