Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
