my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
