are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Randomize
