True but thats because hes a fetus.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
