Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize