Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Randomize
