Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize