Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
No subtext here. People are naked.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
