I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize