Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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