wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
How does it feel to date your dad?
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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