guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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