i think i have herpe
just one?
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
