is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Randomize
