Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Randomize
