there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
