i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
God I need to hump something, right now.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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