i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
