she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
