yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
