i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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