Whod you bang
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
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