marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
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My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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