Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
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