I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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