This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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