And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves