at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
He had some BAD nuttage
It's like cleavage......... but different
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us