You're my little dorito
did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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