Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
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