Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
