Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(870): View more from Arkansas

I look better un-naked...

Fav 10 952 3833
share tweet
(419): View more from Ohio

i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself

Fav 19 3614 4915
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(757): View more from Virginia

I understand Curling. That high.

Fav 39 7634 1206
share tweet
(254): View more from Texas

His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!

Fav 15 5215 2115
share tweet
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Read it at the TFLN blog
(727): View more from Florida

You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.

Fav 3 1260 2887
share tweet
(601): View more from Mississippi

i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.

Fav 5 1118 2066
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(608): View more from Wisconsin

He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.

Fav 14 2248 1158
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(517): View more from Michigan

I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is

Fav 1 688 487
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(330): View more from Ohio

You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower

Fav 1 43 17
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT