He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
